Bear with each other and forgive whatever grievances you may have against one another. Forgive as the Lord forgave you. Col. 9:13
KEY NUMBER FOUR: Getting Rid Of The Hurts - Forgiveness
Have you ever asked the question "What in the world is the matter with me?" Or have you come to the conclusion that you are different from other people? The truth is you are no different than anyone else. It's a "bill of goods" that the devil has put before you; and many have bought it - heterosexuals and homosexuals alike. A homosexual is the same as everyone else. He's a sinner. But Scripture tells us that we are all sinners. The only difference among sinners is the direction in which their sinfulness takes them as they journey through life.
Sin is rebellion against God, whatever the sin may be. Sex is one area in life where our rebellion shows itself. So you see, a homosexual is no different from others at all. Only his sexual orientation is where his rebellion has led him. Like every sin, it can be forgiven and overcome!
There are root causes for people's sin. We need to understand them if we are to get a handle on why we do certain things. There are several causes why some turn to homosexual behavior. The chief cause is thought to be the lack of love from or a perceived lack of love from the same sex parent. Thus, homosexual behavior is not so much a sexual matter as it is a search for love. It is trying to make up in a God-displeasing way for what is a normal God-given need to be loved by our parents.
Heterosexuals can also go looking for love in all the wrong places and end up hurting themselves every bit as much as homosexuals. God condemns both; but for Jesus' sake will forgive both when there is repentance and a living faith in Jesus.
But the lack of love has other effects that possibly lead a person into homosexuality. A lack of love can fill us with deep hurts and if that is accompanied by some sort of abuse, it can lead to unresolved hate in our hearts. But these are not the only hurts that fill our hearts; there are all the hurts we have picked up along the way that we tried to forgive, but have never really forgiven. You can't really forget until you have forgiven; and even then it may take some time until the hurt becomes only a faint memory so that it no longer makes you hurt all over when it comes to mind on occasion. A sign of full forgiveness is to remember a hurt and no longer feel anger toward the person who hurt you.
What is needed is to practice conscious FORGIVENESS. If homosexuality is ever to lose its hold, a Christian must first experience the peace that comes from his own forgiveness by God through faith in Jesus.
Maybe, you've never thought of this. Maybe, you've thought that you have forgiven all along. Maybe, you've tried to forgive, but haven't really succeeded. There are ways of telling if you have a lot of unforgiven hurts bottled up inside of you. In his book, HEALING FOR DAMAGED EMOTIONS, David Seamads lists four main things that crop up in our lives if there is a lot of unforgiven hurt still within. These are: ...a deep sense of unworthiness; inferiority
...a Perfectionist complex
...being filled with fears
Then he says, "The whole area of sex is intricately mixed in with these others..."
Isn't it interesting that forgiveness should be one of the subjects included in the Lord's Prayer? It is so important that we are admonished many times to forgive; and our own forgiveness depends on our willingness to forgive others. If it is that important, should we not deal with this matter seriously?
But you have worked so hard on suppressing some hurts that you don't want to dig them up again. Yet, you have to. And then you must take the time to forgive that particular sin. Dig them up again! Let them see the light of day. They aren't buried anyway, they are just lying there simmering and gnawing away at you and causing the wrong reactions within you. Let them die in the light of your forgiveness. The light of forgiveness will surely kill them off and free you from them for good. Isn't the hurt worth it?
But, you say, this unforgiven hurt has hurt you too often or too deeply or both. They don't deserve your forgiveness. Right? Wrong! You've done the same thing to God and He has forgiven you and will keep on forgiving you until the day you die.
Kill off your hate through forgiveness and let the sunshine of God's love fill your soul! Let your forgiveness free you from the guilt of all the sins that your adopted homosexual life style has led you into. Break another link in the chains that binds you! Do you really want to be a slave to the hurts of by-gone years? FORGIVENESS means freedom!
<-- SWORD OF THE SPIRIT -->
THOUGHT FOR THE WEEK****************************
To be wronged is nothing.......unless you continue to remember it.
WORDS OF HOPE AND HELP: (Write below the thoughts that you get from these passages of Scripture. Explain what each passage does for you.)
Matthew 18:21-35 Luke 15
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